Sometimes there really is not an answer for our questions. That is when we have to turn within and really seek what it is we are about to learn. Life brings various people and experiences before us that shape us and mold us. Often we think we understand just what it is that we are to do or think we know what choices to make. Fortunately, for us, we are not supposed to know our future. It hurts sometimes- the not knowing, the wondering, the wanting of something we are not sure how to get. This is when we have to choose to keep walking our path and to learn to embrace the unknown.
It is in the surrendering of our need to control what happens to us that we sense a release. A type of freedom. Willing ourselves to not fear the ending which has already begun. Taking a stance of contentment within the sight of adventure. Looking through lenses of spontaneity, allowing time to have a life of its own. It is in these moments where we learn our most valuable lessons. Illuminating inside of us who we really are, what it is we dream of, how we want to walk that next step forward... and most importantly learning how to love.
Building a wall around our hearts just keeps us stagnant and sanitised from the natural event called change. We have to forge forward into the unknown even when it hurts. Not letting our hearts fall to the wayside just because it seems easier to let it go. Giving up on the passions that characterise our very being is detrimental to living. Without a muse in life that we are drawn to with every ounce of ourselves, living seems pointless.
Lets dare to do more than simply move through the motions of time. Taking a second, third, forth, and hundredth look at what lies before us. Deciding what it is we are going to pick up and adorn ourselves with when an array of options lay in front of us. We can sit back and take the leftovers or we can ignite soul within ourselves and fight for the desires that are birthed with each passing moment. Not squandering off the treasures we think we have but glancing again and discovering that underneath those treasures is what gives us purpose. The meaning of life, one dares to hope, is something more than waiting where it is we find ourselves standing right this minute.
When pain strikes a nerve in us and creates a paralysing force that urges us to freeze, no matter where the wind of change is bidding us, we have to make a choice. Is this life valuable enough to challenge the tides and currents? Can we make it over our continuously rising and falling emotions? Absolutely. We may not be able to rewrite our beginning but one thing I know for sure is that we can surly start from today and rewrite our ending.
All this to say, I find myself standing at the door of change. An internal shifting brews beneath the surface of my heart. Will I stop my heart from feeling what it does? Will I mask truth in order to save face? Definitely not. I am learning to instill within the depths of my spirit an integrity, a nature of freedom, a stance of peace, and a soul turned heavenward. Questing beyond the norm, beyond the external expectations, looking for and identifying with what is best for me. What it is that drives my purpose forward instead of falling and stumbling backward. Learning in each timely moment one more facet of this journey called life, more pointedly, this adventure called love.
